Transient Ego
A poem by Valantis Gaoutsis,
The Master Shift
December 29, 2016
I run-out -for the time being- of ego satisfaction
I don’t have the need to be loved, but the need to be in love
So, don’t worry, cause this way I will let you tell me
that you forgot to fall in love with me.
I will accept it and I will believe it, just as I believed -without a shadow of a doubt-
in the power of fate that brought you one day to remind me that:
The universe is not small and there isn’t such a thing as coincidences,
only desires that their seize has transformed them into prays
and someone was there to hear them.
I know, it’s hard to be loved by someone, but allow me to show you your own self.
I run-out -for the time being- of the existence of the impossible.
I have the desire of the lamp that is flickering.
“Will it go out? Will it not?”
Hence, I find myself in a state of “Being? Or not being?”
The tangible love -that feeling that inevitably flows together with time
entrapped in a permanent present- is the barrier of permanent desire.
The real desire of a person stops where response begins.
It is in our nature to be charmed by the uncertain,
to keep us stuck on it.
It is in our nature, to reset the desire
in order to get a new, uncertain, non-corresponding one.
It is in the nature of a man
to secretly search for the intermediate between happiness and unhappiness.
For a whole lifetime, we seek to satisfy our egos,
with the result of our true desires being lost on their way.
This is what ‘ego satisfaction’ means:
The Making of a desire that was disoriented.
I won’t bother you. I’ll be brief.
I run-out -for the time being- of ego satisfaction.
I don’t have the need to be loved, but the need to be in love.
I know, it’s hard to be loved by someone, but allow me to show you your own self.
I don’t have the need to be loved, but the need to be in love
So, don’t worry, cause this way I will let you tell me
that you forgot to fall in love with me.
I will accept it and I will believe it, just as I believed -without a shadow of a doubt-
in the power of fate that brought you one day to remind me that:
The universe is not small and there isn’t such a thing as coincidences,
only desires that their seize has transformed them into prays
and someone was there to hear them.
I know, it’s hard to be loved by someone, but allow me to show you your own self.
I run-out -for the time being- of the existence of the impossible.
I have the desire of the lamp that is flickering.
“Will it go out? Will it not?”
Hence, I find myself in a state of “Being? Or not being?”
The tangible love -that feeling that inevitably flows together with time
entrapped in a permanent present- is the barrier of permanent desire.
The real desire of a person stops where response begins.
It is in our nature to be charmed by the uncertain,
to keep us stuck on it.
It is in our nature, to reset the desire
in order to get a new, uncertain, non-corresponding one.
It is in the nature of a man
to secretly search for the intermediate between happiness and unhappiness.
For a whole lifetime, we seek to satisfy our egos,
with the result of our true desires being lost on their way.
This is what ‘ego satisfaction’ means:
The Making of a desire that was disoriented.
I won’t bother you. I’ll be brief.
I run-out -for the time being- of ego satisfaction.
I don’t have the need to be loved, but the need to be in love.
I know, it’s hard to be loved by someone, but allow me to show you your own self.
Translated in English by
Anna Ioannidou
About the Author: Valantis Gaoutsis is a Greek composer and poet. Born on April 18, 1992 in Athens, Valantis comes from Corfu island. He is a University of West London graduate.
Until now, he has worked with a number of notable well-known and non-famous artists from the world of Greek music and theater. During the last two years, his poems and prose writings are published in print and electronic newspapers in Greece and Cyprus.
In December 2015, he has been awarded at the International Poetry Competition of the European Art Centre on the Jewish Holocaust, by participating with the poem: “The Sound of Time”.
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